I have not been to my Dad’s grave since 2016. The last time my Mom and I visited Union Cemetary where he is buried. We were forced out of Alabama and she died in California December 25, 2019. I could not bring her home to bury her as my life was in danger in Alabama. So I had to bury her in California. She wanted to be buried beside my Dad at one time.
After I came back to Alabama I could not bring myself to visit my Dad’s grave. I felt like I failed at protecting my Mom from danger. I felt like I failed protecting my Dad’s wife, my beautiful Mom. I just could not go see him. This feeling broke my heart and caused me great anxiety and sadness.
Yesterday I did go to Brewton, Alabama for the first time in seven years. I did not feel any of the negative emotions I have felt for the past three years. I felt like my Dad understood that I did all I humanly could do, under the circumstances my Mom and I were dealt.
I promised him I would get him and my Mom reunited in death, as in their physical bodies. I told him I loved him, and that I hoped he and my Mom were happy again together and to wait for me.
I used to keep his headstone cleaned. When I got there his name was barely legible. So I took some detergent, bottled water and disinfectant wipes and cleaned it. It isn’t perfect, but looks a lot better.
– The Peppermint Unicorn 🍬🦄
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